Waiting

picture of window with wooden shutters and a wooden frameHe opened the wooden shutters and peeped out of the window, standing well back so as not to be seen. Nobody there. He strained his ears, listening for…something, some sign that he was not alone. Nothing.

Someone was coming. Not yet, but it wouldn’t be long now. It was no use running. There was nowhere else to hide. It would all be over soon. All he could do was wait. He waited.

He almost missed it. A flash of red amongst the trees.

It was time.

Licking his large teeth, he hopped into bed, closed his large eyes, and waited.

This post is part of the 100 Word Challenge for Grown-Ups at Julia’s Place.

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22 Responses to Waiting

  1. Very clever! What big eyes you have!

  2. Colin Graham says:

    That’s not how I remember that story… interesting to do it from the wolf’s point of view!

  3. wcdameron says:

    Ah, Sally Jayne, this was great! It was the flash of red and the large teeth that tipped it for me.

  4. GSussex says:

    What a classic tale to incorporate. The flash of red gave the link as it unfolded. A great piece!

  5. That gave me quite a chuckle! I had no idea where it was going until she licked her large teeth.

  6. ventahl says:

    You know, we came across a hunt some months back, stampeding across fields and hedges like they owned it, with an entourage of the well heeled in their 4x4s. Snooty bunch. Think they lost the fox that day! I don’t think the one in your piece will be as lucky …. 😦 Was touched by her soulful acceptance of her fate.

  7. Lisa Wields Words says:

    Powerful. Waiting for the end. You create such tension with so few words.

  8. Sally-Jayne says:

    Thanks for all the comments folks!

  9. Lorely says:

    Love it! The window looks so pretty – just think what’s lurking inside!

  10. susankmann says:

    Love this, a great new take on what I am guessing is a long told story of a little red hooded girl. Very cleverly done. x

  11. And not a word about poor Grandma! Very well done.

  12. Lynda Dixon says:

    I like it. i love stories that leave you wondering right up to the end.

  13. Ha ha this is such a super take on the prompt. Like ventahl I thought it was a fox at first , but realisation dawned. Clever piece 🙂

  14. Tinuke says:

    That was so well written, I loved it! At first I was thinking it was something out of ’24’ but with the big teeth and the flash of red the plot quickly became clear. Really clever!

  15. Jim says:

    Awesome. I might just steal that idea and use it in class. See what the kids can come up with.

    Great idea for the writing prompt. I wish I was as imaginative!

  16. Fabulous! I wonder if Ladybird Books would like this version – a ‘Wolf’s Tale’ by SJB 😮

  17. jfb57 says:

    Brilliant! How clever! I wasn’t sure where it was going so you gave me a surprise. I agree that it should be used in class. There may be another venture here Sally-Jayne!

  18. This is an excellent take on the prompt! His anticipation of the delicious meal ahead…almost like waiting for a takeaway to be delivered 🙂

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